The Dog Who Goes “Squee”

*** You should know that the small lizard in the web comic, “Sheldon” also goes Squee! Please visit http://www.sheldoncomics.com/ to enjoy some very funny strips. ***

I have dog. A big, ferocious looking dog. A dog that weighs more than me when I’m in very good shape. This dog is tough. Toddlers ride him. He can pull me down 3 city blocks without even thinking about it. He feels that the neighbors’ boxer-mixes are just there to be eaten, like so many hors d’oeuvres on a leash.

He scratches his ear for a while and then he scratches it too hard and he goes: Squee!

He wants to go out, but only if I go with him, and when I don’t he goes: Squee!

He wants me to get up early and feed him, but not so much that he’s willing to get off the bed. He just rolls over so that he’s squashing me & goes: Squee!

You cut his toenails: Squee!

You try to put goo from the vet in his ear: Squee!

You are on the phone and not, at the moment, taking him for a walk: Squee!

These are heartrending cries. Sounds that make you think, “What’s going on? Some tiny, Hallmark-TV-Star-puppy must be trapped in the storm drain! Quick! Do something!”

He can bark fiercely when he wants to. Mostly he wants to at cats and deer. And woe to any scary, carnivorous deer who lurk on the other side of our backyard fence. They will be barked at. And then some. And then the dog who goes Squee! will look at you as if to say, “Did you see? I chased the deer away! They’re gone! Look! Let me out so I can chase them!” I have no doubt that, should we ever be plunged into extremes of hunger and poverty, I could course deer with the dog and our house would become known as venison central.

The dog who goes Squee! is a sight to behold, striking terror into new neighbors who ask, “Is he friendly?” from a distance.

This dog is a very sweet marshmallow.

Squee!